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How To Flashing chilli w01

hi and welcome to what we can call a new chili summer tasting, - - because i have just gotten my hands on some freshly harvested chilies. and welcome to you too smash man. yep! and thanks for joining us today. you don’t need to f..king thank me for anything. i’m not here of my own free will, damn it! let's just get this shit over with and get out of here man! what the hell is happening in this homo shop i’m in here. i have with me today some freshly plucked chilies.

yeah yeah fine! just like new potatoes from samsoe. samsoe potatoes?! i hate those damn samsoe potatoes man! they are really shit potatoes man. i prefer the ones that have been lying around since last year. nice and yellow and soft. ooooh! samsoe potatoes! what kind of shitty homo program is this i have gotten myself into! so! as i said; these are chilies. and you are pretty mad about chilies, aren’t you?

absolutely not! in fact, i hate chilies.i hate any type of spicy food. i have nothing against eating them. i’m no sissy god damn it! and don’t accuse me of that shit on tv man! i eat whatever is served. that's how i was brought up. my favourite is fried sausage and potatoes from the take-away in otterup. but you probably don’t know that place. do you? no not really! no, i didn’t f..cking think so.that’s just shit man! in any case. i have brought these chilies with me.

you probably know these. they are "habaneros"… nope! okay. well it’s a relatively hot chili. yeah, yeah whatever! and i have these yellow ones. they are called "big yellow" and they are freshly plucked. big yellow! you can’t call that little shit "big yellow". give it a proper name, will you. call it "little yellow". i’m not completely stupid. don’t try and take the piss out of me man!

you call it "big yellow" and then you produce a shitty little pea. what the hell are you up to!! chili klaus… just a bunch of f..cking liars. the lot of you!! oooh it’s a big, big yellow… well it’s just because the first ones of the season are very small. you know what i mean? and then there is the last one… maybe you know this one, it’s called a "carolina reaper" - - one of the very first of that type… yeah. and i have brought a few extra just in case you want to go all out… yeah, good, good!! so. what do you think then?

let’s just go for the worst one… yeah! ok! well then i think we should wait with the "big yellow" and try this one… they aren't very big, but you said you would have a whole one, didn't you? of course i want a whole one dammit. you can’t cut that in half. i won’t even be able to see it… do you want half of this here man?... it's the size ofâ a f..cking raisin. i'm a grown man. do you know how much i eat? i need something to live on. maybe you can handle a small half of a big yellow!! shit on shit man! this is the worst gay homo shit i have been involved in for a long time… just get on with it, for f..k’s sake!

what! uh… oh yeah of course! do we fry it or what? you can just try and smell it, so you maybe can get a feeling of what it can do! oh sure, that was a great feeling i got there. it smells like piss… its smells like piss! it smells like my piss at home when i piss up the wall. it smells exactly the same… calcium and piss! shit that stinks! do we have to fry it or something. maybe a bit of meat with it or something?

you can’t eat that shit on its own man! we normally… here at chili tasting ehhh… what do you normally do at chili tastings dammit! we normally just…what’s it called…eh we simply just eat them. you eat that raw shit there? yes and we chew it a bit and we say cheers. f..king hell! how stupid is that. you are not going to make a fool out of me. i might as well say that from the very start. we can cut it in half so it will be a bit easier.

then half it again and then there’s nothing left of it at all for god’s sake man! well just take that there. that should be easy enough to handle… does it not need to be washed or anything man? yeah, yeah that’s right. of course we do - - yeah that’s what the f..cking glass of water is for man! f..king hell man!! you start and i’ll watch first… ok, but remember you have to chew it well. chew chew chew chew… i will make up my own mind. i have learned how to eat for god’s sake, don’t start interfering like you’re my f..king mother man.

have you put it in your mouth yet? no, not officially… well put it in then for f..k’s sake. they are, like i said, some of the very first of the season - - and it will be quite interesting to see if they are just as hot as you imagine them to be. they definitely have a… f..king hell!!...f..king shit!!...f..king jesus!! goddammit!! what the f..k were you doing there man! you put some shit in my mouth and my tongue starts to wither!!!

chili shit klaus. what the hell are you up to!! it’s like my whole speaking apparatus has been paralyzed man!! it’s definitely…it’s definitely hot…its definitely f..king hot man… yeah! oooh jesus! that’s soo hot!!! i have got to say, that really hit the f…king spot. you’re allowed say that… if they start putting that in the fried sausage and potatoes in otterup - - then it won’t burn any longer man! holy shit! my tongue is paralyzed. my tongue is paralyzed... i’m not joking, it’s starting to swell.

sometimes i have been in doubt… “it tharting to thwell”...! hic!! if the first cut is as hot as the last. god damn! it’s good i didn’t eat a whole one of that shit man! ladies and gentleman… that’s some shit man! ...denmark’s very… denmark’s very own... smash… smash man, thanks for letting us come and visit you…

holy shit man! wow. that went well...yeah! that went damn well, i must say. really damn well… and he just gets up and leaves too. leaving me to sit here in pain. shit, i’m telling you man! that’s just crazy, i only chewed it twice and my tongue is completely paralyzed. holy shit!